This morning I went into town to do some errands. These included checking mobile phone prices because mine died on me this morning. It's had a hard life in the last four and a half years so I can't really complain, though I wasn't too impressed by the way the salesman sniggered after asking "May I have a look at your current phone?"

Anyway, as I was looking in shop windows I started looking at watches. I don't know if you've noticed the growing trend but it amazes me how many yards of watch display now feature watches by non-watch companies.

If I wanted a suit I wouldn't buy one off Timex, or designer wear off Citizen or Sekonda, so why would I want to buy a Hugo Boss watch, or one by D&G or DKNY?

I haven't decided on a new phone yet, and I certainly haven't solved the puzzle of why people would pay to have a watch made a clothes designer.

It's just one of those 21st century days when I find myself wishing for a sudden flash of insight.

Or a machine gun. A Heckler & Koch as used by the SAS. That should do the trick, I thought.

Then I checked on their website.

They make bloody watches!